Surfer Girl

LA JOLLA, CA June 2009

Rules of Surfing:

1) Don't panic. You will always have lifeguards if you get into trouble.
2) Wade in cautiously (to avoid the stingrays), but with purpose.
3) Be courteous to other surfers.
4) When you fall, protect your head but don't be rigid.
5) When you catch a wave, focus on staying balanced, ride it as far as you can and, regardless of the outcome, congratulate yourself for trying.
6) Remember that Rules 1-5 apply to love as well :-)


In addition to surf lessons, hiking and strenuous yoga in La Jolla, my trip to CA included visiting my friends in Sacramento. It was wonderful to see Tin and Margaret and play with their boys, Daniel and Matthew.

Here are a couple more shots of La Jolla-- beautiful!!

At the moment, I am happily ensconced in my friend's apartment for the next two weeks. I am doggie- and house-sitting while she meditates at a monastery in Nepal (no joke!). It's in the same building that I will be moving to in a month, so I get to enjoy the pool, gym and other amenities that I have missed at the house.

I got back yesterday from visiting my brother's family in Virginia. I've missed them so much!! It was great just to hang out and do family stuff with my nieces and nephew, sister-in-law and brother. We ate burgers at Red Robin, shopped at the farmer's market, and swam at the pool. At the Air and Space Museum, we saw an exciting IMAX movie about fighter pilots and munched on freeze-dried ice cream. We also strolled through the old town of Winchester and bowled a few games at the bowling alley. Mostly, though, we stayed home and BBQ'ed on the deck, took long walks and shot golf balls into the woods. My brother even took me for a ride in his re-built convertible Porsche. He put the top down, and we raced down the country roads in the dark. The smell of fresh-cut hay reminded me of other times and places that I miss. It was just good, old-style family time. Here are a few pics of the fam':
Red Robin burgers?! Count us in!
Four!!!!!!
All grown up..!

Energized

Hi ya'll! Thank goodness spring is here again because it is hands down my favorite season in Atlanta. After hibernating all winter, I get moving and active again. Brad and I have challenged each other to lose ten pounds by my last day of work (June 10) and the winner gets $50. We have been weighing in every Wednesday morning, and I have finally lost a few pounds after the scale not budging for me for weeks despite daily early morning forays to the gym, lunchtime walks and afternoon runs at the park. I feel better and my pants have some breathing room.

On weekends, we've been out and about, hiking and crippling ourselves at a batting cage. I am also making Brad chase me for 3 miles around Chastain Park on Saturday mornings when the poor man would rather be sleeping in. Since I signed us up for a 5K Run/Walk in September (much to Brad's dismay), we now have something to train for.

This weekend was pretty domestic: we did some yardwork because our yard was beginning to resemble a jungle (lions and tigers were spotted lurking among the weeds). Otherwise, I'm just holding on tight until the end of the school year. Things tend to get a pretty stressful in May for teachers. June seems so close yet so far away! My tentative summer plans include a trip out to CA to see friends and then a road trip up to VA to finally see my brother's family around the 4th of July.

The good news is that Delta now considers me a "domestic partner" since Brad and I have lived together for 6 months. That means I now fly standby for FREE anywhere in the world. Um, yeah. I'm speechless, too. Get your guestrooms ready, people..!

On the other side of hell lays paradise

If you are one of the perhaps three people that even occasionally check this blog, you've noticed that I haven't written much lately. I have to be honest: it's been a tough year.

Some of the "trail by fire" experiences include Brad's father passing coinciding with the beginning of our relationship back in March, moving beneath the neighbor-from-hell in June, and then subsequently moving into a house together with Brad in December. As I wrote about a couple of blog posts ago, this last event has required a lot of adjustment, compromise, learning and personal growth on both of our parts. And as my friend, Laura, says: "You can't yoga your way out of this. You just have to face it and go right through it."

Which is scary, people. VERY SCARY. You, see, I can't just walk away like when I was dating casually and would suddenly realize two dates into a relationship: "This dude is a selfish asshole!" Or "Boy, that one is a misogynist!" Or, "Gee, he's actually a manipulative, self-serving commitment-phobe."

Well, ok, ok, you CAN walk away in a committed relationship... but only long enough to get yourself calmed down, get some perspective, and most importantly, get back to "I love you. We'll work this out because you're worth it."

So, despite our dramas, I have to sing Brad's praises. He's sincere, thoughtful and considerate. He brings me roses, plans surprise birthday parties, cooks an amazing gourmet dinner for Valentine's Day-- complete with diamond necklace-- just because. It doesn't feel over-the-top. There's no schmoozy, hidden agenda which has characterized other guys I've dated. Brad has just been very sincerely loving and kind to me.

He's also hysterically funny and can be incredibly patient and selfless, even when I'm a hormonal, paranoid, drama queen b*tch. He's teaching me by example how to love unconditionally and not turn away when fear and baggage rear their ugly heads. He's teaching me to trust in love again, and I love him so much for that.

Oh, and he has a cute tush :-)

I'm such a lucky woman...!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Here's a shot from my birthday dinner at Ru-San's two days ago. Brad had just finished serenading "Happy Birthday" to me in front of the whole restaurant, with me standing on a chair. He's got a great voice!

Can you tell I was fighting a cold brought on by our New Year's festivities? We had rung in the New Year at a downtown ultra-lounge with lots of drinks, pizza, dancing... and trying to find a taxi in the cold. So, I got the sniffles on my birthday. What can I say? I'm sensitive like that :-)

Let's see... what else? I got to spend lots of time with Brad (who had off) and local friends Rochelle, Larry, Aaron, Kim, Bridget, Todd, Laura and Carrie, along with Carol, my friend visiting from California. I also hosted my first Hanukah dinner of brisket and latkes which I understand was a success. I heard from friends far and near via cards and email, and that is pretty terrific. In fact, although the commercialism of the holiday season drives me crazy, it's the connection with friends and family at this time of year that makes everything OK.

Yikes! I can't believe I return to work tomorrow. Time has flown by too fast.

Another step in the journey

If I had written this blog any sooner, I would have written about how the end is at hand.

Sure, I can see it all clearly in hindsight. I assumed that moving to a house was no biggy. After all, I had moved internationally several times, lived with housemates and previously set up a household with a significant other. It was inconceivable to me that even one of these events would be a BIG DEAL to somebody else. So, my mindset of "Let's just get it done!" clashed with Brad's "I can't do all this so fast right now."

Yes, this whole "moving in together" experience is stretching the very tight muscles of my mental yoga.

I am assured by many friends who have "been there, done that" that this rocky transition is a normal part of two single, independent, older adults moving in together and unpacking baggage, both literally and figuratively. That with time, patience and commitment, things get better. I hope so. In the meantime, I'll try to practice what I preach: to be in the moment, to accept whatever unfolds and to love unconditionally, no matter the outcome.

Our new home!

Woo-hoo!! We found a nice home to rent! Look at this place!Just kidding! (It was a bit out of our price range.) However, after examining our various housing options...




...Brad and I decided to go with the following:
It has a beautifully landscaped backyard for Brad to tackle with power-tools, a patio and deck which are begging for a BBQ, and it is situated in a quiet, safe neighborhood. It's not far from where we were, so our commutes to work haven't increased. But the best part of all is that it's QUIET. It's even-- dare I say it-- SERENE. No adolescent rappers blaring their bass at all hours of the night, no dog poop in the hallways, no rude neighbors. Just towering trees, a trickling koi pond, nutty squirrels and french doors to gaze at it all as I do yoga. Life is good.

Fall Break

While this stormy financial and political climate has us all hunkering down to protect our assets, I am doing so with tissues, echinacea and warm salt water gargles. Apparently, my body thinks a week off from work for Fall Break is an appropriate time to fight a cold. Grr!

Brad and I had hoped to nip down to Florida for some beach time. Instead, we're doing local stuff since that's about all we can afford right now. You see, we're saving up for some interesting changes coming our way a year or so down the road. That means I have to cut out travel that isn't paid for by my work (Anybody headed to Denver in March?? I'm being funded to attend a conference there! And maybe one in Waterloo, Belgium!), along with eating out and other extraneous expenses...Which I hate because I miss my friends and family who are far-flung across the States and Europe!!!!!!!!

So, this fall break has been a low-key one. Brad and I went to Leopard Lounge last Saturday before I got sick, danced to some 80's tunes and got a lil' tipsy. We also visited the DeKalb Farmer's Market and got a big ole' pumpkin which we carved tonight and baked the seeds. (see above)

I'll leave you with a quote that I got in an email:

"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."